Rewarding MARRIAGE.
Introduction:
How to create and keep a joyful marriage God's way following Christian, Bible-based advice
As I daily interact and come in contact with married couples as a Pastor, I have observed that most married couples are poorly prepared for marriage. Their information frequently comes from poor parental examples, friends, personal judgment, and other misleading sources. Many have the unrealistic expectation that everything will work out naturally simply because they are in love. The following key suggestions will help you create a rewarding marriage.
Love God together.
What does it mean to Love God together as a couple? It means making God your focal point in your lives as a couple and letting Him and His word have the final say in your fellowship.
And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment. (Mark 12:30)
One of the things that Hannatu my wife and I have discovered in loving God first together as a couple is that you free yourself to enjoy the marriage covenant for what it is rather than trying to make it something it's not. Yes! Things work best and bring us God-given joy when we use them how God designed them to be used.
When we Love God First; it is about giving Him his rightful place in our lives with willing hearts that have surrendered to His Lordship through Jesus and have been empowered by the Holy Spirit to live and abide in his word for His glory.
This is the truth that we have cherished and treasured in our hearts these past years as a couple to daily reflect God’s love in our marriage, living out Romans 12:1-2, presenting our very being as a living sacrifice, and allowing God to renew our minds, resulting in knowing what is good, acceptable, and His perfect will for a rewarding life and marriage.
Living as One Flesh.
Remember, marriage is a mystery compared to Jesus and His church (Ephesians 5:32). It involves two different people coming together to become one; forming one union. No one marriage is the same, because no two people are the same.
“And the two shall become one flesh.’ So, they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” (Mark 10:8-9)
As we daily continue to fellowship as a couple in line with God’s word, we have learned through the past years that living as one flesh is a union of body, mind, and spirit that reflects something of God's nature. Building this kind of oneness doesn't just happen in deep discussions, but rather happens in the daily things of life we do with and for one another. There are a variety of to-be lists and to-do lists, throughout the Bible for Christians concerning how we treat each other. They are often referred to as the “ONE ANOTHERS.”
The following is a list of a few of them we think can be directly related to living as one flesh in a marriage covenant:
1. Romans 12:16: Live in harmony with one another
2. Romans 15:7: Accept one another
3. 1 Corinthians 7:5: Do not deprive one another
4. Galatians 5:13: Serve one another in love
5. Galatians 5:15: Don’t spitefully hurt one another
6. Galatians 5:26: Don’t provoke or envy one another.
7. Galatians 6:2: Carry one another's burdens.
8. Ephesians 4:32: Be kind to one another.
9. Ephesians 4:32: Forgive one another
10. Colossians 3:9: Don’t lie to one another
11. 2 Corinthians 1:4: Comfort one another
12. Titus 3:3: Don’t hate one another
13. Hebrews 3:13: Encourage one another
14. James 5:9: Don’t grumble against one another
15. James 5:16: Pray for one another.
It is truly rewarding to live our lives and focus our marriages on these amazing biblical mandates on how to treat our spouse. Don’t take your marriage for granted. Do something every day that will bless your spouse and strengthen your marriage. These “ONE ANOTHERS” are perfect “to-dos” for a healthy marriage.
Live as Heirs of the Grace of Life.
Remember the words of the first man in the garden when God presented the woman to him for the first time; … “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” Genesis 2:23.
His words affirm to us that there is a bond between the man and his woman in Marriage. What does this mean? God’s plan for Marriage is between one man and one woman, and it is a Covenant. When we approach and accept marriage as a covenant, we are making a life commitment that cannot be broken, but only grows stronger and more meaningful with time till death do us path.
Therefore, the husband and wife need to have a clear understanding of this truth, living and accepting one another as designed by God.
Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered. (1 Peter 3:7)
As a couple, Hannatu and I have together come to understand that our relationship with one another is one of the most important human relationships that should not be taken lightly but must be reverent for that is what God wants from both the man and the woman who are bound in the covenant of marriage. As a Husband under the leadership of the Holy Spirit, I am daily willing and making effort to honor and live with understanding/knowledge with my wife. Yes! it is challenging and demanding but is part of our covenant responsibility as Husbands. And on the other hand, as we continue in fellowship as a couple, I see in Hannatu, my wife the passion and willingness to daily live and be the woman, the helpmate that God has created for the man. It is also challenging and demanding. The point here is that we do not live as strangers, we are not abusive, disrespectful, or suspicious of one another. We have challenges just like other couples but we are always willing as the Holy Spirit leads us to face the challenges together with humble hearts.
Let me conclude by saying that Christian marriage is more like a marathon, not a sprint. What’s the difference? Think about the running events in the Olympics as an example. The sprints are between 100 and 400 meters in length, a little more than a quarter mile, once around the track. A marathon is 42.2 kilometers (26 miles plus 385 yards). Sprinters burst from the starting line and run at top speed a race that is measured in seconds. Marathoners pace themselves to run with concentration and endurance for two to three hours. Sprints require leg power; marathons require great lung power and capacity. You and your spouse have linked hearts to serve God and get through life with all its joys and pains together. Your long-distance race isn’t about winning as individuals; it’s about helping each other go the distance and finish well. Grace of our Lord be with us. Amen
Rev. Isaac Bangalu,
Founder & CE CASNFCI
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